Thursday, January 22, 2009

Shoop, Shoop, Down They Go

We had the opportunity to take the kids skiing on Monday, and WOW...they've been bitten by the skiing bug (which I think is going to send me from the poor house to the flat broke house!). Friends of ours belong to a private ski club, so it was the perfect combination of individual attention from ski instructors and a pretty small crowd that gave the kids a chance to really learn. They had no idea what to expect, and all came away with a hint of some serious ski skills (with MUCH to learn, but a GREAT start!). Here some fun pictures from Monday.
Here they are, waiting for their instructors. At this point they were impatient, sweaty (the lodge is HOT) and a little nervous. But aren't they the picture of ski-bunny-ness?
Maggie came very close to not skiing. She was so hot, and quickly melted down about everything ("my neck hurts, my legs are itchy, why are these boots so tight?"). She was the most nervous, but ended up doing very well...skiing alongside her instructor by the end of the day.
It shouldn't surprise you that Libby never lost focus, didn't complain once and could not wait to get up on those skis. Every morning since Monday, she's asked me when we're going skiing again (next weekend). Even after two solid hours of instruction, with only a short break for hot chocolate, she wanted to keep skiing.
We met the family we went with through Jack...their son is one of his closest friends. And he (the friend) has only been skiing a year, but is pretty good (naturally). So Jack was very uptight about having to stay on the bunny hill, and "learn"...and being embarrassed in front of his friend. I don't think he had realistic expectations of how hard it is to learn. Anyway, he also did great...was learning to turn by the end of the day, and is also very anxious to get back on the slopes (and yes, he had a hair cut yesterday...he looks like a rock star and made me spend $12 on Paul Mitchell shaping balm. I took a picture of him this morning...will post it tomorrow...I think he's gonna be a lady killer).
The future Suzy Chapstick and Peekaboo Street (skiers have goofy names).
Jack with his instructor, Joe.
Steve and I had front row seats to the all the activities and literally beamed from ear to ear with pride for the entire day. However, we are old, slightly plump and do not wish to ever be on skis. So we drank beer and took pictures...even of ourselves. I get kudos for posting such an extreme closeup of myself,, wow...where did all those wrinkles come from?

Sunday, January 18, 2009

The Animal Odd Couple

I just love this story. Sniff, sniff. In other news, I'm on a new project, so time is limited and I'm feeling a little frazzled, but new posts this week (I promise!). In the meantime, enjoy!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Job at the FBI

I have 3 Marshall's gift certificates to time to type. So, while you're waiting for a real update, enjoy my favorite joke.

The FBI had an opening for an assassin.

After all the background checks, interviews

And testing were done, there were 3 finalists;

Two men and a woman.

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of
The men to a large metal door and handed Him a gun.

'We must know that you will follow your Instructions no matter what the circumstances.

Inside the room you will find your wife sitting In a chair . . . Kill her!!'

The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could Never shoot my wife.'

The agent said, 'Then you're not the right man For this job. Take your wife and go home.'

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was Quiet for a bout 5 minutes.

The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried, But I can't kill my wife.' The agent said, 'You don't Have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.'

Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the Same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the Gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one After another. They heard screaming, crashing, Banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was Quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the Woman, wiping the sweat from her brow.

'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said. 'I had to Beat him to death with the chair.'


Women are crazy. Don't mess with them

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Someone please send the boy a cookie...

An email from Justin today (he asked for my new address to send Katy's's like Christmas!):

Big box, including some nice shoes, some crappy but good shoes, pair of new winter boots and the usual Katy broken in stuff.

Some good for working with dad under the Chevy, but most pretty decent stuff.

I accept cash, cash and cash, or you could send me my freaking cookies you procrastinator.

Holy shit!

God created the earth in 7 freaking days.

What kind of damn cookies take months to make?

Oh, and I want some lobster tails.

Nothing too ostentatious though.

Don’t want to come across as uppity.

Thank you for the gifts Martine.

You and mom did not follow the rules, but as I was one of the benefactors of your reckless rule breaking, thank you.

Did you know my birthday is next month?

40 years old.

That’s a big one.

Needs to be celebrated just right, with huge and very expensive gifts.

Like a box of freaking damn ever loving cookies!

I will accept cash, liquor and freaking cookies.

Chivas Regal is a nice, gentle hint.

55 gallon drum should work just fine.

You do know how to bake right?

This whole cookie thing is going to put me in therapy you know.

Oh, I also like meat.

The basics. Brisket, ham, turkey, dolphin tongue…the usual.

Summer sausage with those fancy little cheeses. Now that’s the way to a mans heart right there!

Or you can send him freaking COOKIES!!!!!

I like guns!

And my truck.

Oh shit.

I think I might be ADD.

Did I mention cookies?

Have I told you about my gun?

Its big you know.

I oil it every night, and sometimes in the morning too.

I will send the package out in the morning munchkin.

Lots of love

Your cookie starved, meat craving gun rubbing brother.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

This Might Kill Me

Oh my hell. I'm so hungry. Day 1.75 of my diet and I'm starving.

And before you tell me I need to fuel the machine, that I need to eat to lose, I am eating! Real food. Real healthy food. I'm just not gorging.

And my belly. It likes to be gorged. With cheese. And maybe a package of rice.

In a Nutshell

Kids went back to school yesterday...kicking and screaming all the way. Got a call from the school nurse at 1pm, Maggie has a "bad stomachache"...the child practically skipped out of there!

Stepped on the scale 1. Ten pounds by June 1st...totally attainable, but perhaps impossible (I could lose, gain, lose and gain the same 10lbs in 5 months, fer crissake).

Job is changing again. Still waiting for my new assignment...learning something new is stressful, but at least I have a job, right? Fingers crossed.

My neighbor gave me a cool calendar this morning...I love transferring all my info to a new calendar with a new pen and super neat handwriting. Does that make me a dork?

More later this week...